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Monday, November 06, 2006

Love Speaks ...But Not Always In Words

It was one of the most depressing days I was witnessing in the last few weeks. I was taking life a little more seriously than it actually is, I guess. But then at that time everything was getting darker and darker for me. I was getting anxious about my career and my overall "LIFE". For years I have programmed myself to win and watch things work according to my wish. By God's grace my life has been like someone working 24/7 as per my wishes ...what you call--"Your Wish My Command". So Life has been a cake walk for me till Failures started knocking my door.

Anyway the point is that due to all this I could not handle the failures in my life. When things became a little unbearable I gave up and cried my heart out. Last few weeks were a part of my WEAK PHASES in life. But as they say it EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY....even that passed away. The best part of those dark days was the realisation of the Unspoken Love in my life. Just because your Mom does not say it often or your Dad does not tell you in words, it does not mean that they dont love you. In the similar way there are many people in our life who never ever say those three words I Love You, but still stand by you when you need to know that you are not alone.

The same thing happened the other day. When I was feeling real lonely and lost, All my cousins and my sissie dear called me the same day just to assure me "dont worry deepu tai we all are here for you". The most touching as well as strengthing my spirits was the call from Varun who called from Dehradun just to ask me what was wrong!! The most touching thing was that he had the patience to call me 7 times as I spoke on the other line to Viraj who called from Singapore to tell me that he missed me ...No way did he say that but his call spoke for him ...hehe ..Any way coming back to Varun, at that moment it was so easy for him to misunderstand me that I did not pick up his call and just let it be !...But No ..he had enough care and concern to wait till I finished the other call, and kept on trying till I picked up his call. He has been always a man of few words but the words he said today will remain with me forever. The first reaction expected after such a long wait is "Where have you been yaar, I am trying for so long(in an irritated tone) !" But the first thing he said was " Kaay zalaa Deeputai tula ...bari aahes naa?..Itki ka depress zaali aahes!" And at the end of the conversation there was an assurance that said " Aamhi aahot naa deeputai ..kashala kaalji kartes"

Hmm those words acted like a cool soothing breeze during a Hott sunny afternoon, like the warmth of a blanket through the cold dreadful night!! The irony is that we keep on running behind the people who never care for us, and ignore those who love us so much!

The same day morning Kalputai called just because she kept on remembering me the whole day (her day ...my night when I was thinking of none other than her as I cried)....telepathy works i guess. She never ever says that she loves me, even though I keep on saying it to her a 1000 times ...she just reacts with a dry tone " aww ok yaar, same to you"he he !! But the funniest part is that there is no one in this world who has understood me better than her, not even my mom.Not that my mom does not understand me at all but i need to tell her what I mean, which seldom happens with Kalputai. I have seen tears roll down her cheeks as she tried to calm me down saying "aga deepu sagla neat hoil ...dheer dhar" huh ...

Its such a blessed life to have so many people loving you so much, and these stupid failures bother me so much ..huh ...Need to improve I guess!!!

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